The comedian shared jokes that she cut that revolved around Tilly Norwood, ICE, and Julia Roberts.

Nikki Glaser reveals the Golden Globes jokes that didn’t make it to air, including shots at Sean Penn and Wicked

The comedian shared jokes that she cut that revolved around Tilly Norwood, ICE, and Julia Roberts.

By Wesley Stenzel

Wesley Stenzel is a news writer at **. He began writing for EW in 2022.

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January 13, 2026 3:11 p.m. ET

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Nikki Glaser at the 2026 Golden Globes. Credit:

Rich Polk/2026GG/Penske Media via Getty

Nikki Glaser is sharing some of the jokes that she didn't get to tell on the Golden Globes stage.

The comedian appeared on SiriusXM's *The Howard Stern Show* on Tuesday to discuss her second time hosting the awards show.

"I was gonna come in at some point and say, 'I'm hearing from the bar that we're out of ice. And you know what? We don't really need ICE. And actually, I hate ICE. I've never even wanted ICE,'" Glaser said. "It was gonna be something like that, and even that's just like, being jokey about it — it's too trivial."

Nikki Glaser at the 2026 Golden Globes.

Glaser also planned to take shots at the box office bomb *Christy*. "People just aren't going to the theaters to see things, and if you don't believe me: there was a movie this year where Sydney Sweeney played a lesbian who just bounced around in tiny shorts for two hours, and it made $14," she joked to Howard Stern.

Glaser explained why she opted to cut the joke. "Audiences just didn't like it. It just wasn't killing as hard as all of the other stuff," she said. "And [Sweeney] wasn't gonna be there, and it's a joke you have to do at the top of the show, and it's like, we're bringing someone into the show that's not even here."

Similarly, Glaser crafted a joke about a right-wing political commentator, but ultimately gave it the ax because she didn't want to invoke him on the show. "*Wicked*. *Weapons*. *Sinners*. These aren't just things Tucker Carlson is screaming at the screen as he watches tonight. These are movies nominated tonight," she said. "Just didn't wanna mention Tucker Carlson's name at the top of the show."

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The comedian also cut a pair of jokes about Tilly Norwood, the AI actress who generated controversy after a report suggested that talent agencies were considering signing her. "Everyone's concerned about AI. Tilly Norwood is the first star to be completely generated by AI, and somehow has *still* been sexually assaulted by three different studio execs," she joked before explaining the cut. "That was great, but that one we had to take out, but we had another one about the Epstein list, and we were like, there's too much sexual assault going on, so we had to lose that."

Glaser then shared the other Norwood joke: "I love that they made a fake actress but they still couldn't *not* be creepy about it. 'Okay, what if she's 18, but looks 14, but with eyes that say, 'I do anal?'"

The host also shared the joke that Steve Martin wrote for her before he backtracked and asked her to nix it. [My writer] said, 'Hey, Steve sent in a joke.' And he read it to me," she remembered. "And later on he said, 'Steve said don't do that. It's not the right tone for the night.' And he was right."

The joke? "It was some version of 'I just got back from D.C. from performing at the Trump Kennedy Center,'" she remembered. "It was something about [the] Trump Kennedy Center. And here I'm at the Trump Beverly Hilton. It was something about that. And it was like, you just don't wanna say that guy's name. I just don't wanna give it space."

Steve Martin at the 2026 Golden Globe Awards.

JC Olivera/2026GG/Penske Media via Getty

Glaser also considered a joke about the demographics of the nominees that played on a few actors' last names. "Martin Short, Jeremy Allen White, Gary Oldman: these are three actors nominated tonight. Actually, short, white, old men are also most of the actors nominated tonight," she said. "And that was just cut because it felt too woke. It was clever but it wasn't funny."

Glaser's favorite target while writing for the 2026 ceremony was Sean Penn, who was nominated for his supporting performance in *One Battle After Another*. "Sean Penn is nominated tonight, I'm assuming for Best Neck Veins?" she quipped. "Sean Penn is here, looking like the defiant last tree standing in a rainforest."

Most of Glaser's jokes about Penn revolved around his appearance. "Amanda Seyfried is nominated for both film and TV tonight. Not to be outdone, Sean Penn is nominated in both hickory smoked and mesquite flavors," she said. "Two of the hardest working actors are here tonight: Sean Penn's lower eyelids. Give it up for them."

One of her Penn gags also implicated his *One Battle* costars. "Sean Penn, Benicio del Toro, and Leonardo DiCaprio are all here tonight for the category 'Least Eyes.'" Glaser joked. "Leo, why are you always squinting? I mean, I assume it's to read your girlfriend's ID, just making sure that the year starts with a two."

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Glaser said that she cut a joke about Julia Roberts because audiences at clubs disliked it as she tested out material before the ceremony. "I literally thought I was gonna be tar and feathered after the show because the audience turned on me so hard," she remembered before sharing the joke. "Julia Roberts is nominated for *After the Hunt*. I don't know what it's about, but I'm assuming the hunt was to find someone who has seen it."

The comedian also ditched two jokes about *Wicked* actors because their subjects didn't attend the ceremony. "Jonathan Bailey is here. Jonathan is the first openly gay man to be named the Sexiest Man Alive by PEOPLE Magazine," she said. "And at first I was like, 'Do we really need to say "openly"?' And then I looked at a list of past winners, and I was like, 'Oh yeah, we do.'"

She continued, "Jeff Goldblum is here tonight. Not because he's nominated, just 'cause they were doing an ad for Apartments.com down the street and he just kinda wandered in. Jeff doing ads for apartments is hilarious. You haven't lived in an apartment since you were a fly."**

- Awards Shows & Events

- Golden Globes

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Source: “EW Golden”